Do you feel like a Mere Mother?

Have you ever said these things in response to the question, “So, what do you do?”

“I’m just a mom.” 
“I’m on an unpaid sabbatical at the moment.” 
“I work part-time from home when I’m not changing poopy diapers or scraping oatmeal off the floor.”

 “Five Myths About Motherhood that Make You Feel Mere,
and Why They’re Wrong”

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Does telling people that you spend most of your day mothering make you feel small and inadequate?

Do you feel like you need to justify the career sacrifices you make for you kids—or even apologize for them? 

Or has juggling the never-ending demands of motherhood with a career pushed you to the brink of sanity?

I get it, mama. I’ve been there. I am there. After a dozen years of performing on a professional stage, I decided to hang up my costumes and take a role on a different kind of stage––––one made of linoleum with a spotlight of fluorescent kitchen bulbs. I swapped Broadway show tunes belted out to thousands of theater-goers for lullabies sung softly to an audience of one. 

We are seen as “mere mothers,” and our role is tragically undervalued.

My transition from stage performer to stay-at-home mom wasn’t easy, but it made me realize how much our culture marginalizes women who forfeit formal careers to stay home with their kids. In a society that espouses female empowerment and economic independence for women, the vocational mom is made to feel inadequate. And part-time working mothers aren’t much better off because they aren’t doing their part for womanhood either. We are seen as Mere Mothers, and our role is tragically undervalued.

Now I work part-time as a podcaster for Life Audio, a contributing writer for Crosswalk and iBelieve, and a freelance writer published on Christian Headlines, Bible Study Tools,  inCourage and more... in addition to being a homeschooling mama of five––––and I feel a different kind of mere. There isn't enough of me to go around.

But here's the truth––––it takes incredible sacrifice, strength, grace, and courage to put other dreams on hold and dive headfirst into motherhood, with or without a another job. It’s a decision that can be isolating, especially when everyone seems to have contrary opinion. But this path is incredibly rewarding. Yes, the motherhood stage is small, but it is the most fulfilling role of all. And there is nothing MERE about it––––except the perception of some. But that’s ok, let them think what they want. We’ll wear that mere proudly knowing that the mere is what matters the most.

Yes, the motherhood stage is small, but it is the most fulfilling role of all. And there is nothing MERE about it.

Hey Mama! If we were having a cup of coffee and comparing rap sheets, here’s what I’d tell you about myself. I earned a couple of degrees, spent a dozen years acting professionally, won some awards and had some crazy dreams. I always planned to move to a major city and hit it big, but I never did. Instead, I did something I never thought I’d do.

I became a mom. 

And not just any kind of mom––––I became stay-at-home mom. For fifteen years. I had my fifth child just weeks shy of my 46th birthday. I’m not kidding, and I’m not crazy. Well, I’m a little crazy. I never wanted to be a mom, but I discovered something that I never imagined—motherhood is incredibly fulfilling. And fun. And hard. And amazing. And exhausting. And rewarding. And challenging. And . . . sacred. Yes, being a mom is a divine calling, and it is the greatest role I’ve ever played. 

So now I’m a wife to my best friend of 27 years, I homeschool our kiddos, I have a really cool podcast where you can hear my old acting skills in action, and I'm a contributing  writer for Crosswalk and iBelieve, where my articles reach tens of thousands of readers every month. I’m passionate about God, my family, and about helping moms feel valued in their homes and in our culture. 

I never wanted to be the woman I am today—but I like the woman I am today far more than the woman I wanted to be. Being a mom is the best thing that ever happened to me. How about you?

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2021 Selah Award Finalist!